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Mental Health Check

This shit sucks, amirite? You deal with your affliction in ways that people don’t understand you. You throw off a bad vibe, sometimes unsettling. And its heightened by pain.

My affliction is MDD (Major Depressive Disorder). Its been in and out of my life for as long as I can remember. There was only one thing I remember that “kept” me happy. And that is no longer an option.

I wish my friends could understand that I never meant to hurt them in any way. But this doesn’t excuse my behavior towards them. In a way, I hope they can forgive me for any pain I caused.

The one thing I know for sure is about this time every night, I cry. I reflect on my day and cry. I’m not healthy by any means. And to some people I am pathetic and weak. And that is true. I am.

I used to feel empathetic so much so that I could sense the vibe in a room so intense no matter the emotion. Basically, if vibes could bounce of a mirror; I would be that mirror. If someone was sad, it would drag me down with them. Or angry. Any emotion directed at me, I would reflect it.

That’s kind of gone away with prescription medication to help me with my depression. So many times I tried to reach out for help, but nobody seems to understand and nobody knows how to help. Except for doctors.

I wish there was a way I could reach you.

I’m going to place this article here. I hope it helps with some insight.

Follow the rabbit.

Be well. Check in with yourself. Often. See how you’re doing. Mentally and physically.

One response to “Mental Health Check”

  1. […] Whether we psychoanalyze ourselves or unwind by other chemicals, when we check in with ourselves, we tend to put more focus on outside contributing factors, such as stress, diet, medicine, alcohol, etc. without really addressing the problem within. (Check In) […]

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